Not Me Monday: Disconnected & Discontent

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It has not been been six months, since I've written my last Not Me Monday entry. And ironically I did not write about my dad being in the hospital then too. I'm also not writing this at a little after midnight on Monday morning, bc I never have trouble sleeping & never have a lot on my mind. No, Not Me!

We did not have over 26" of snow here & something called Thundersnow, which I've never heard of before, let alone never saw before Saturday morning. Our street is not still covered in over two feet of snow, which prevents anyone from leaving the house -unless they leave by foot. My Father-In-Law (FIL) did not do just that & go to High's to get essential things like milk, eggs & chocolate, only to discover that our streets is one of the only ones not plowed yet. Then, I did not listen as mom told that they are telling people that it may be another 24+ hrs until the side streets are plowed. No, Not Me!

I'm not frustrated that Jake may not be able to go to work tomorrow bc of the street not being plowed. I'm not aware that my wheelchair that's been broke for months finally has all the parts in & is ready to be fixed, but I cannot get anywhere with the combination of snow & a broken wheel. No, Not Me!

I do not wish my dad was not in the hospital, even though I know that a hospital is where he needs to be right at the moment & if he needed to be anywhere that I could not get to him - I would want him to be there. I am not worried that I still can't get to him bc I'm trapped in my house. I am not also worried how he is going to get home when he gets discharged, since we cannot get anywhere at the moment & my brother was in a bad accident Friday. No, Not Me!

I am not aware that this week is six years exactly that Jake & became members of our church that we so dearly love. I was not disappointed that snow kept church from happening this week. I did not think all the time of my friend Beth who is a key person in making sure that the blizzard that fell on us is taken care of on the church property. No, Not Me!

I am not secretly relieved that my Theophostic Prayer Ministry (TPM) training class got cancelled this week due to the snow. I do not feel this way bc I'm tired of the classes that I love very much, but rather bc I had such a personal revealing, & difficult ministry session last Tuesday that I'm still trying to process & think through. I know - without a doubt that the session was beneficial to me, & I am very thankful for it, but I do not have the desire to face certain people before I think things through some more & get things right in my head. No, Not Me!

I do not sometimes wish that I had a friend who I could have an open & honest conversation with about my faith, & my walk as a Christian & this journey I have found myself on, without feeling like I'm being judged or infringing on his or her time. No, not me!

I am not feeling that bc of thoughts & feelings I'm going through right now that I'm withdrawing or being disconnected to friends & people around me. I do not have a strong desire to connect with others, even if those others are strangers friends I have not met yet out in Blogland. So, I do not dare you to leave a comment telling me that you stopped by & share your thoughts. Or better yet, give a follow & stay awhile, so I can get to know you too! No, Not Me!

Another Award: How Fabulous!

I received another award! How awesome is that? It is nice to see that my blogging is being shared with people other than I know personally. And It's nice to know that those who follow me, read what I write & truly care. I would continue to write even if no one read my blog though. However, everyone who has a blog should have a following bc it just makes things more exciting, I suppose.

Anyway, Debby from Just Breathe gave me this award (Much Thanks!) and the conditions of the award is that I name 5 obsessions of mine & pass the award onto 5 people. So here it goes:

1. My camera & taking photos. I wasn't always good at taking photos, but I learned from my mistakes & improved on it. I currently feel naked though - my camera got mysteriously broken a couple of days ago so, I don't have one right at the moment. It's secretly driving me crazy!

2. My Nieces & Nephews. I love them. So very much. Really. They are my world. It started back when Christopher was born, 16 years ago. Then Devann came 3 years later. Now, I have more nieces & nephews than I can count! {:) One thing is for sure though, I don't know what I would do without them. And I can honestly say, they have saved my life many times throughout the years.

3. My Pets. I have a zoo. Remember? I know, I'm not supposed to have favorites (or is that just with kids?), but I love Pee Wee. He's playful, compassionate, a good cuddler, does lots of tricks -including take off my socks, & loves me unconditionally. No matter what.

4. Bottles. As in water bottles, drink bottles whatever. I love them, have too many of them; although ever since I moved on with Jake, I can't ever seem to find them. I am always thirsty & always have a bottle with water in it with me. It's just how I roll. {:) Literally (a little bit of wheelchair humor).

5. Stores. Not buying stuff, just looking around in them. Especially places like Rite Aid or grocery stores. I could spend hours in them. I think it comes from spending a lot of time in the car as a kid waiting while mom ran into places.

Now, for the 5 6 people to pass this award:

Em @ Glorify Him Withe Every Breath,Kate @ Called Out One,CC @ His Heart, Amy @ Inside Amy's World, Tarah @ Eyeglasses & Endzones, & Ellen @ To The Max.

Not Me Monday: Taking Flight & Staying Grounded

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It has not been forever (or it seems that way) since my last post. I have not been busy focusing on family. No, Not Me!

Friday morning, my dad did did not call 911, get rushed to the hospital with a rapid heart rate and extreme difficulty breathing. Which resulted in Jake & me rushing to Dad's local hospital. No, Not Me!

After several doses of medicine to slow his 145+ (at rest) heartbeat failed & wondering why his pacemaker/defibrillator was not shocking him back into normal sinus rhythm, the doctors did not decide to Life Flight him to another hospital. And I didn't take pictures of it bc I thought when he was feeling better, Dad might like to see them. No, Not Me!

When we arrived at the second hospital, we were not told that the doctors shocked my dad's heart back to normal rhythm & that he would need a procedure called an ablation so that this pesky rhythm that baffles the pacemaker into not firing (or it's firing has no effects on) does not occur again. No, Not Dad!

Dad did not also have a bunch of other breathing issues like COPD (for one) & an infection on top of everything else, which has not been getting better day by day. And he was not in (& still is) in heart failure. No, Not Dad!

They did not almost release him today, without an ablation & say he could go home (much to our family's dismay). So, that Jake could call out of work yet again, so that he could take him home - only to find that they are going to keep him & do the procedure in a couple of days (Praise Him). No, Not them!

I have not stayed grounded with my feet firmly planted on the ground. I have not done remarkably well through this whole ordeal (so I've been told) - keeping the faith that everything will work out how it is supposed to be according to His Plan. No, Not Me!

Oh, and I'm not asking for you to please send up a prayer on Dad's behalf, if you are so inclined to do so. No, Not Me!

Not Me Monday: Reflecting

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It has NOT been forever since my last "Not Me" post. Unless you count this. No, Not Me!

I have not been neglecting things in my life, or at least felt that way this week. I do not wish I could be cloned sometimes so that things get done. I have not let calls go unanswered from certain (nameless) people, hoping & praying that whatever they needed would wait. And most certainly did not feel guilty about it. No, Not Me!

I do not think at times that I should be a better daughter, wife, sister, aunt & friend, even when I feel that there just is no more for me to give. Bc I've given all of me. Even more of me than I truly could not give, bc there is just none left. No, Not Me!

I do not still think of Mandy, everyday, every night, sometimes over & over, still disbelieving that she is truly gone. Even though I was there. I saw it. With my own eyes. I do not think that the silence of her voice, not hearing her stories is - well, deafing. No, Not Me.

I do not have doubts, & fears about the future. Regrets about the past. And sometimes wish I could have a re-do - take 2, even though what ever I have been though has made me who I am. No, Not me!

I am not human, after all. No, Not Me!

Not Me Monday!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

This is my first Not Me! Blog. Here it goes...

I am not getting tired of pushing myself in this manual chair waiting for the parts to come in for my power chair. I am not annoyed that Invacare just got the order Thursday and that shipment of all my parts should be shipped today, even though the parts should have been ordered almost 3 weeks ago. No, NOT ME!

Yesterday, I did not arrive a half late to church, then head to target to get a gift card for my friend Kimba, the stop in this christian store that we never saw before; ran it this heatlth lady there, she talked about having a good poo, bought some ground flax seed - spending some money we really didn't have. Then I did not go to Babies R Us to look around (don't ask, really - don't ask), and become fasinated watching my husband fittle around with the macanics of strollers. No, NOT ME!

Then, we did not drive over an hour to Kimba's BBQ to enjoy seeing her and meeting her dog, Cali, just to feel slightly out of place and to be reminded of just how old I really am... or is it how young everyone else is? No, NOT ME!

Then (yes, it gets even better), I did not see in the GPS that the bar that I met my dear feiends Mickii & Phyl at 12 years ago (through a camp outting to the bar when I was 21. And before you ask - Yes, they really do take a bunch of adults in wheelchairs or not, all of whom have some type of disablilty to a bar for a night of drinking - soda or otherwise, dancing and just plain fun) was only 20 miles away, and guilt my husband into (sorta) going to see if they were there; only because I've lost contact with them - their phone is disconnected, one got married, ect. I did not get there and the owner Suzie say

"Hey, Shannon! You're early!"

"Early?"

"You know camp's comming in tonight, right?"

"Oh, I didn't know. I came here to get in touch with Mickii & Phil because I lost contact with them."

I did not procede to sit down, order water and a tea. Then eventually a burger for me and a basket of fries for Jake. Allthewhile keeping the bill under 10 bucks, again, because we really didn't have money. Why do all the bills have to be do in the begining of the month? And did not ask for the bill, pay it then say goodbye to Suzie, for her to tell me that camp was unloading the van as we speak. Then I did not spend almost 2 hrs talking to people I haven't seen in forever and catching up with an old friend Sarah. Did I mention Jake had to work this morning? Finally leaving, to drive an hour and a half home and crawling into bed at 12:15 AM... No, NOT ME!