There was scripture, meditation, a lot of prayer, singing, harp playing. A lot of time to reflect. All which lasted only a short hour, but was amazing.
I cannot lie - as amazing that it was, it was difficult fro me. Everything is difficult it seems now. To focus on ashes, the whole purpose to realize that we were created in our human physical form, which will not last forever. From ashes we were created & to ashes we will return.
Somehow, death is different for me now & I can't explain it. Last night, I spent a lot of time thinking of Dad, myself, crying & remembering how it feels to breath & to not only do it, but do it deeply.
Patsy lead us in the amazing meditation. One that I wish I had a recording of it, so I could do it again. Truly amazing, especially for me. Historically, it is very difficult for me to relax, but last night, at least for a little while it wasn't. My guess is it has lots to do with trust & for whatever reason I was able to be in a place where I felt safe & loved.
I thought a lot about what to give up or add, for that matter, for Lent, something which I should have thought of before yesterday, but didn't. Last year I gave up avoidance, remember? Something that challenged me & change me in many ways. This year, the only thin g I could think of is to make a conscience effort to blog daily.
Then after reflection & much consideration & deep thought - it came to me. For Lent, I'm going to work on letting go. What that means exactly, well, I'm still trying to figure that out. Letting go of what I'm not sure, but I do hope by letting go that I find myself again.
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