Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Slow Motion

I am numb. The world around me is in slow motion.

I hate this all to familiar feeling that always occurs after the death of someone I love. This too will go away, replaced with a myriad of other feelings & thoughts that accompany grief. Even though I don't particularly like slow motion, I am thankful for it.

It has not hit me that she is gone, but I know it will. Probably in an oridinary moment or several of them. Whenever it may be, I know that the raw intense emotion will expose me. And I don't even care.

I will continue on - trying not to isolate, pull away & withdraw. Writing when I can, as often as I see the need - returning to the theraputic outlet that has served me greatly in the past.

For now, I know the world around me continues on. My world slower than the rest & the numbness egulfing me, as I wait for reaility to hit - praying that when it does, it will be gentle.

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